How to Deal with a Screaming Toddler

A screaming toddler can be a nightmare for parents, especially when you’re at the grocery store or a restaurant. Most toddlers go through this stage – in fact, some toddlers go through this stage more than once.

Sometimes it may seem like your toddler is screaming just to frustrate you, but this isn’t the case. It’s usually a cry for attention, or it may be simply that they just feel like it. Screaming in a big building like a mall can generate a pretty cool echo, so it’s only natural that they’ll want to experience it.


In a lot of cases, screaming means they want something which is normally something they can’t or shouldn’t have. My son threw a hissy fit in a store the other week because he wanted out of the cart. I had to cut my shopping trip short and take him out to the car.

Dealing with a screaming toddler

Don’t retaliate – Sometimes you may want to scream right back at your child, but believe me, this doesn’t work. In the end, it turns out to be a competition to see who is louder and the outcome is nothing but some sore throats and maybe a few tears.

Distraction – A better bet is to use distraction as your weapon against a screaming child. For example, if your child spots some candy in the grocery store and starts screaming, try pointing out some healthy snack options instead. Or you can try playing a game like Eye Spy. This works well in my case, although a lot of times I have to try a few different things before I’m successful. For my little guy who is almost 2, I point things out that are new to him and get him to repeat what I’m saying. I say it with as much enthusiasm as possible so that he gets excited too.

Prepare – Planning ahead is a great idea when you have errands to run. I always have snacks in my purse along with a sippy cup. If it’s going to be a long day, I’ll also throw in a few toys. I try and keep separate toys just for our outings so that they’re always interested in them because they’re special.

Schedule – Before you head out, make sure your toddler is well-rested. A good time to go out is right after nap time or right after she wakes up in the morning. You’ll also want to make sure she’s got a full stomach. Toddlers can get pretty cranky when they start to get hungry.

Get them involved – Involving the kids as much as possible is also a great way to avoid screaming. My daughter loves to press the OK button on the ATM machine when I run to the bank. She also loves to help pick out grocery items. This keeps her mind occupied on the task at hand, and not on something else that she can’t have.

Choose family friendly places – If you’re planning on eating at a restaurant with your toddler, opt for the more family friendly places rather than a quiet or more formal setting. I always choose one particular restaurant in town when I take my kids out. It’s always packed and noisy. That way, if my kids start screaming it won’t be as noticeable. I also order a baby plate as soon as we sit so the kids can eat right away.

Indoor voice – Something as simple as asking your toddler to use their indoor voice may just do the trick. I’m always surprised at how well it works. I learned that from watching Barney! That funny purple dragon or whatever he is sure comes in handy sometimes. Or is he a dinosaur? I can never remember.

Stay calm – Keeping your voice and your tone quiet and gentle will help set a good example for your child. As much as you might want to raise your voice, maintaining a neutral tone will keep from making the situation worse. This can be extremely hard to achieve, but it’s worth it in the end. It will also take a lot of practice, but I’m sure that by the time your toddler has grown up you will have plenty of it!

Bail – If you’re out in public and nothing you’re trying seems to be working, it might be best to just leave with your toddler, even if it means leaving a grocery cart full of food in the middle of aisle 12.

Acknowledge, but don’t give in – If your child is screaming because they’re upset about something, acknowledge their feelings and help them work through it. If they’re screaming because they want something they can’t have, don’t give in just to have some peace and quiet. That’s only going to make things worse in the long run.

One thing to remember is that this stage will pass. It may be hard to think about that when you’re in the middle of a crowded place and you feel like everyone is staring at you because your child is screaming at the top of their lungs.


Chances are however, that none of those people will remember you the next day. What matters is your family, and how you deal with them at difficult times. Don’t sacrifice an opportunity to encourage good behavior for the sake of a few strangers’ opinions.

How to Calm a Fussy Baby

As cute and loveable as they are, babies can be extremely difficult to deal with when they’re fussy, especially if you’re by yourself and there is nobody around to help you.
The first thing you should know are some reasons why babies cry. If you can identify the source of your baby’s discomfort, then you’ll be more able to come up with a solution to calm them down.

Why do babies cry?

• They are too warm or too cold
• They’re hungry
• They have a dirty diaper
• They’re tired or restless
• They have allergies
• They have an illness (cough, cold, flu, etc.)
• They want comfort from being held or pacifying
• Breastfed babies can have a reaction to mom eating certain foods 
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• Here are some suggestions you can try to help calm your fussy baby.

  Music – Play a calming lullaby cd for your baby.
  Wind Chimes – Hang some wind chimes in your house and let your baby play with them.
  Infant Massage – This method is becoming more and more popular. Massaging your baby is proven to help calm him and create a new bonding experience.
  Fart – No, not you! Get your baby to pass gas. A common cause of fussiness is a gassy tummy. Try bending their legs to help ease their stomach pains.
  White Noise – A fan or static on a radio can create a soothing sound for babies because it mimics the sounds of the womb.
  Nursing – If you breastfeed your baby, this can be one of the best ways of calming her down.
  Hold your baby – Despite what many people say, you won’t spoil your baby by holding him. By comforting him when he needs you, you are building trust.
  Get some air – If your baby is a little older, he may enjoy going outside for a walk in the stroller. Many interesting things are waiting to be seen outdoors.
  Put on a video – Baby Einstein is great for bored babies. They love the music and colors. This is a great opportunity for you to sit with your baby and help them learn by pointing out objects and naming them as they see them.
  Swaddle – Most newborns like to be swaddled because it makes them feel like they are back in your tummy.
  Dance – Turn on some tunes and dance with your baby. This can also be a great bonding experience.
  Sleep – Lay down with your baby and see if they fall asleep. They may just want to rest but want to stay close to you.
  Mirror – Sit your baby in front of an unbreakable mirror. Babies love to see their own reflection.
  Time out – Take your baby to a quiet place. Their fussiness could be caused by overstimulation. They may just need some time to settle down.
  Swing – Buy a baby swing or sit in your own garden swing. The rocking motion mimics the motion of being inside the womb and is great for calming baby.
  Drive - Many parents resort to taking their baby for a car ride. Be sure not to use this method too much as your baby may start to depend on it for going to sleep.
  Your voice – Try holding your baby to your chest and talk to her or someone else. The sound of your calm voice can be soothing to your fussy baby.
  If all else fails, gently put your baby in the crib and close the door. Go to a quiet room and take a few deep breaths. If you’re alone, ask a neighbor or a close family member or friend to come over and help you out.
  
  
  

Getting Your Baby to Sleep Through the Night

Every parent has had those sleepless nights where baby just won’t settle down. Unfortunately, a lot of parents go through this every night. Whether you stay at home with your baby, or you leave the house to work during the day, endless nights of waking up around the clock will eventually wear you down.
You’ll get exhausted, moody and won’t be able to even think straight! Or maybe this already sounds familiar to you.

Most parents suffer from sleep deprivation at some point. Its just part of parenthood. Even those lucky enough to have babies who are good sleepers eventually have to deal with getting their toddlers to stay in bed. What gets really frustrating is reading so much conflicting information about getting your baby to sleep through the night. But what you must understand is that every baby is different, so not every sleeping method works. That’s why there are so many different opinions out there. But I’m not here to give you an opinion or tell you what to do. I’m just going to tell you exactly what I did to get my son to sleep through the night.

How I got my son to sleep through the night

First, you have to understand that I only breastfed my son until he was seven weeks old. I had to have surgery shortly after he was born and couldn’t breastfeed for a few days. I tried hard to pump and keep my milk supply up, but I finally had to stop torturing myself and my son and start feeding him formula.

A few weeks after that, he started sleeping through the night. What also happened at the same time is I started putting him down awake (breastfeeding would always put him to sleep). At just over 2 months, I was sure that it wouldn’t work, but to my surprise it did.

The trick was to put him down at the precise moment he started to get sleepy. I watched him like a hawk and eventually I could tell when he looked tired. His eyes would get red around the rims and they would start to look heavy. This was the only sign. Occasionally he would yawn, but his eyes would give him away sooner.

I had always read to watch for babies rubbing their eyes when they were tired, but neither of my babies did that until they were a little older.

I had also read to create a bed-time routine, but I have yet to do that with my son and he’s now 8 months at the time of writing this. My daughter didn’t have a bed-time routine established until she was almost a year old. So far, both my children have been excellent sleepers.

Why does it work?

Now, you may be wondering how putting a baby down when he’s awake will help him sleep through the night. Here’s my thoughts from experience. When a baby is put down after they are asleep, they’ll eventually stir and will probably wake up. If they aren’t being held in your arms anymore, they might get upset and want to be back in your arms. So they’ll cry until they are.

If you put them down while they’re awake and they fall asleep on their own, they won’t be startled when they wake up because they’ll be right where they were before they fell asleep.

Of course, I have no idea what goes on inside a baby’s head – so this is just what I think, not what I know. I do however know that when my babies were put down awake, they slept through the night more than they did if they were put down already asleep. They also slept longer into the next morning which is sure nice. The better they sleep at night, the better they nap during the day. And the better they nap during the day, the better they sleep at night.

If my son does happen to wake up in the night, I usually just put his pacifier back in his mouth and he falls right back to sleep. Some mothers may want to crucify me for this, but hey – it works! He’s happy, healthy, and well rested. (And so am I!)

Getting your baby to sleep through the night probably won’t happen in one day, so here are a few things to think about to keep you sane during those sleepless nights:

Listen to your instincts. Remember you know your baby best. Take all advice you get as what it is, advice. Never let it replace your own personal judgment. You know your baby best and only YOU know what’s really right for him. If it feels right to rock your baby to sleep, then do it. If it feels right to bring your baby into bed with you then do it.

Stop the guilt. Don’t take it personally. A lot of us suddenly feel instant guilt when our baby cries. Are we doing the right thing? Does she need feeding? Is his diaper wet?And on and on…

Comfort them. Remember your baby could be crying for a number of reasons and some are out of your control. Did you know that babies are born with the crying reflex but not the laughing reflex? Well they are… it’s instinctive for babies to cry. We’re going back to primitive times. Babies cry to have their needs met. Sometimes those needs are just to simply cry it out for a bit while feeling the warmth and comfort of their most loved person … you!

Become an expert. Go online or to the library and read a few books on baby sleep and sleep patterns. Arm yourself with all the knowledge that you can so that when others come your way offering advice you can politely say you know exactly what you’re doing.

Whatever you decide, the main thing to remember is that sleepless nights are part of having a baby. Do what feels best for you and remember that this is a normal phase of your baby’s development and will soon end. Those tiny little treasures will soon be running all over the house creating havoc. So enjoy each precious moment (even if its a sleepless one) as much as you can, because it sure doesn’t last long.